Directions

Now all has been heard;

here is the conclusion of the matter:

Fear God and keep his commandments,

for this is the whole duty of man.

For God will bring every deed into judgement,

including every hidden thing,

whether it is good or evil.

Ecclesiastes 12:13-14

I finished reading Ecclesiastes and i really love this book! Everything is so applicable and i love the sarcasm and the truths in it...utimately, i came back to the main reason of living-for you. Not that there's nothing about myself but i only truly found myself when i look to you....maybe that's y u are so fascinating...u nv fails to amaze me...thank you...i'm totally overwhelmed....i'm awaiting...excited about the change you will bring about in my lives...thank you so so sooooooo much!

Yesterday, i thought about going overseas....cuifen mentioned that she wanted to go overseas to work and that it would be a good experience...when i heard it, it sounded so foreign....but the thot has been lingering in my mind since..maybe tis time little Shoeee goes around and see wat's happening beyond Singapore...tis time i get out of my comfort zone...
I have been thinking about leaving everything aside for a while...thinking about a temporary withdrawal to welcome a permanent change in my life....i think tis so tough even to change for the better when i am so comfortable and forever in contact with everyone who expects me to be the same emotional and reckless Shuyi...
Maybe tt's y this idea appeals so much to me....while i was entertaining this thot in my mind, i struggled with so much fear and i realised how much i want to be in control...moreover i really can't bear to leave my Danny behind....my mum, my dad...these people have been around since i dunno when...i love them so much that tis hard to conceive thots that exclude them...but if i dun experience all these new things now, when can i venture out?
Father, what about u? What do you think about this? Will you grant me peace in my heart? Will you grant me courage? Will you give me enough to travel out and work? What is my master's view? Will you tell me? Will this temporary change in environment lead to a permanent change in my life? Will it help me to grow as a person...?

Father, suddenly i feel so small...teeny weeny person with great pride but minimal knowledge....limited knowledge of you and the world u've created...have been so silly and arrogant...change my heart....grant me the humility to learn and the courage to venture out...

Everything is in your hands, Father...

Today Dr Methya toked about how social workers should be aware of ourselves and find an area that suits us...i guess we all have a place in this profession. Was impacted by her words though i dunno how to express it but yup, thanks for enlightening me....yes God, i ask for direction in my career path...please guide me...

Thank you for everything.

In Jesus' name i pray, Amen.