Weight Gain during Pregnancy

It was a big issue for me.

Gaining weight is really a scary thot.

I've never weighed more than 55kg in my life. In fact, i've always capped my weight at 52kg and that was all that i could bear.

Now i am 61kg. I have gained 9kg. It was scary. I am entering into my last 2 months of pregnancy - 33 weeks pregnant and gaining weight like nobody's business.

What a scary thought.

Every time i went for the pregnancy woman gathering and met Huey, i became more conscious of my weight gain. More aware of how much weight i have put on. I've compared myself to her and secretly hated my pregnancy and how it caused me to be fat.

The gathering has stopped because Grace is now pregnant and too tired to lead us. And for the first time i felt liberated because i dun have someone to compare to and i just live and eat so that En En will be healthy.

But today i met Huey again. And it affected my mood. She looked radiant. I looked PREGNANT. She looked good, i looked somewhat bloated and red as i enter into the pre-delivery stage.

I came home, sulked and slept. Awakened but refused to work. So i took up my book to read.

And YOU spoke.


One whole chapter about WEIGHT GAIN. You ended the chapter on how women feared pregnancy because of the weight gain. You were reaching out to me.

Will you help me with my weight issues and idoletry?

Being thin makes me feel good about myself. Makes me feel accepted. It gives me a sense of pride. It used to make me feel healthy.

Maybe i forgot what it means to me.

Now it is beauty that i am concerned with, not health. Somewhere along the way, something went wrong and an unhealthy preoccupation has brought about fear and worry.

Sorry Lord because i am no longer concerned about living right for you. Laziness and sloth has overtaken me in this household and i have been lazy about the upkeep of my personal life.

I used to really want to tidy up my room so that my life will be in order but for as long as i noe it, i have not been willing to bother myself with it.

Though i live in this house, i rejected it. It was not my home because there was someone else in it. I'm sorry i could not accept Danny's mum....deep within my heart. I din want to bother myself with many things because i just din like the idea that i dun own anything...i dunno how to explain.

But Father, i know something is amiss and that is something that we will have to address very soon. Help me Father. Help me to find our how i truly feel about Danny's parents staying in this house with me. Reveal it to me and help me to handle it.

There's a mental block and i can't reach it. It is too deep and perplexed for me. Grant me eyes of revelation to make sense of how i feel about Danny's mum being in this house. Help me Lord.


In Jesus's name,

Amen.